One of the realities of being a professional baseball player is that many major life events have to wait until the offseason, including weddings.
But the Minnesota Twins found themselves in a strange situation: Four players are all getting married this offseason.
On the same day.
COURTHOUSE WEDDINGS ARE BOOMING AS MANY COUPLES SKIP PRICEY TRADITIONAL CEREMONIES
How? Just how?
I mean, let’s say the offseason runs from October/November to mid-February. That’s a fairly large window to choose a day to tie the knot, and yet four couples on the same team just happened to pick the same one.
The Twins clubhouse needs to go in on some Powerball tickets together.
There might be some tough choices to make for wedding guests, and I imagine some brides-to-be were less than jazzed when they learned that their wedding wasn’t going to be the only one that day.
But, if you’re a would-be wedding guest, this is great.
Now, who knows if every person on the team is invited to all four weddings, but it’s reasonable to assume that some will be.
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But every time someone came into the clubhouse after getting engaged, there had to be some guys sitting there going, “Dammit, there goes another weekend.”
Those are valuable. Especially during college football season.
So, when they found out about this bizarre scheduling quirk, they probably realized they had an automatic out for three of those weddings because — at least at the time of writing; technology moves fast these days — it isn’t possible to be in multiple places at once.
That means only one weekend in the fall is occupied by a wedding. That’s awesome.
Now all you need to do is get them a stand mixer or some corn-holders or whatever, and your duties as a wedding guest are complete.
